Strippers vs Zombies [2012]

A werewolf dies in a strip club and it’s up to the strippers to prepare themselves for the next full moon and get ready for the werewolves that will seek out vengeance.

The cast is pretty decent with a few known actors/actresses including a cameo from Robert Englund, but his is very short. There’s some ‘battle scenes’ but they aren’t as lengthy as they could be. Considering the casting the acting doesn’t live up to anything special.

The plot lacks direction due to many subplots during the film, but is it enjoyable? Yes. Is it funny? For the most part. Strippers vs Werewolves is as serious as the title is. The ending was fun though, plenty of babes, some bad jokes which makes it even funnier, and an overall decent watch to kill some time. It does have moments when it picks up, some parts did tend to drag.

5/10 rotting corpses
C Vengeance

Cabin In The Woods (2012)
10-31-12 review

Five teens, your very stereotypical horror movie teens venture out on a weekend trip to, guess where!? A cabin in the woods.

Little do they know they’re not the only ones hanging out in the woods. A film like this can’t be explained without you watching it. It gives too much away, and we can’t be doing all of that.

This film is fun, funny, gory as all bloody hell, and a perfect homage to the horror genre. Don’t expect the scariest movie of all time, it’s not trying to be that. What it is, though, is fresh, bloody, exciting, and thrilling. I found myself rooting for the good guys as much as the bad guys, and didn’t see a lot of things coming.

The acting was on point, a very nice cast, not trying to hard but very effective. If you’re looking for a mastermind of a plot, this isn’t for you. The closest I can give you without spoiling it for you is by telling you to picture Evil Dead, with a little more blood and gore.

I loved this film. It was funny, I laughed through most of it, it had a few intense scenes, and the last 20-25 minutes are just insane.

Enjoy, and don’t go into the cabin in the woods.

9/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

Girls Gone Dead (2012)
10-30-12 review

Rebecca and her friends decide to head out and enjoy spring break at her parents summer home. There, they get naked, they drink, they party, Rebecca runs into her ex, oh, and there’s a killer wielding a war hammer.

This flick has a lot of bad things going for it, bad acting, a crappy plot, and some bad effects.

But, Linnea Quigley as bartender Wild Willie (she looks like Crocodile Dundee’s wife). Howard Stern’s Beetlejuice, and Jerry “The King” Lawler fucking pile drives someone. Also, lots of nudity.

There’s nothing incredible here, but it’s a decent watch. You’ll laugh, it won’t bore you to death, and the war hammer is pretty tight.

6.5/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

The Reeds (2010)
10-29-12 review

A group of 5 decide to go on a boat trip out on the reeds. To their dismay they find that all the boats are taken, that is all but one, that they need to go to the middle of nowhere to get. Once there the group finds a handful of nasty teenagers that are up to no good. When the kids leave, they get on the boat and start heading down the reeds.

The boat ends up getting hit by a sharp object, just as it gets dark and foggy. That’s when everything goes down, teenagers reappear, dogs show up, and the 5 people don’t know how to handle if. Oh, and to top it off there’s a hooded man with a loaded shotgun. There’s a heavy ghost element to the movie, but there’s just too much going on that it becomes overbearing.

The setting made for an awesome location, just too much things going on at once to fully enjoy. Nothing gets answered, and there’s far too many plot holes.

3/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

The Video Dead (1987)
10-28-12 review

When a family moves into a new house (mom and dad are out of the country) the kids (brother and sister) find a TV down in the basement. When he brings the television to his room he finds a woman on the other side talking to him. He also gets a warning, but doesn’t think it’s real.

Zombies eventually come out of the TV with intentions to attack. It’s up to this brother, sister, a neighbor, and an awkward “zombie hunter” to save the day!

The Video Dead is an awesome flick, filled with 80’s cheesy goodness, punk rock, and zombies. Lots and lots of zombies. If you’re a fan of old school zombie B-movies I’d definitely suggest giving this a watch.

6/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

Paranormal Activity 3 (2011)
10-27-12 review

I was bored and needed something to kill some time before bed.

This film is a prequel to the first, a somewhat backstory to what happened years before the beginning. This shows the two main females from the first one as children. They befriend an imaginary friend named Toby.

Their dad notices weird things around the house and becomes obsessed with trying to capture evidence of some kind. As the oldest of the two children makes fun of the youngest, Toby makes his presence known.

Paranormal Activity 3 is no better than Paranormal 1 or 2, it’s a gimmick that ran dry about halfway through the first one. A few scenes that could’ve showed potential, but ran flat. The beginning, and middle seemed to drag. While the end of the film seemed way to rush and ended before anything was explained.

3/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

The Wolf Man (1941)
10-26-12 review

One of my personal favorite werewolf movies ever.

When Larry Talbot returns to town after the death of his brother he meets a woman after spying on her with his telescope. He heads to her shop, ends up buying a cane (with a wolf head on it) and he asks her on a date. She ends up bringing a friend along as they decide to go and see the gypsies to get their palm read. The gypsy reads her friend’s palm and tells her to leave immediately because she is in danger.

Her friend flees and gets attacked by a wolf, Larry went to try to save her and ended up getting scratched by a werewolf. As Larry slowly turns into a werewolf he becomes afraid, more shy, and is viewed as a murderer for the death of the young woman. He tries to find the gypsy to help him, but once cursed, you live with it.

This movie is very well written, the acting is superb, and you could see the pain, and the fear in Larry’s eyes. There’s a little bit of everything here, action, a love story, werewolves, and gypsies. This film still manages to stand the test of time.

8.5/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

The Mummy (1932)
10-25-12 review

In 1921 a group of scientists head to Egypt for an expedition. They find and discover a mummy, believed to be Im-Ho-Tep, a high priest. He comes back from the dead, the scientists die, leading Im-Ho-Tep to escape.

Ten years pass as the son of one of the scientists, Frank, finds the tomb of Princess Anck-es-en-Amon, which happens to be Im-Ho-Tep’s lover. Im-Ho-Tep shows up, very human like with the intentions to bring his love back from the dead. While using the body of the Frank’s girlfriend.

A classic film, very bare bones, but done so well. The film doesn’t drag, and seems to progress rather quickly. A classic tale of the Mummy, a famous monster.

7/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

The Big Doll House (1971)
10-24-12 review

Ah, The Big Doll house, some good old jailhouse exploitation. Featuring a young Sid Haig, and the lovely Pam Grier.

The film takes place in a Philippine prison, where the prisoners (all female) try to plan an escape. An escape from the mean/evil prison warden and an escape from prison itself.

This is sleaziness at its best, plenty of shower scenes, nudity, and even some Pam Grier mud wrestling. The dialogue can be pretty bad at times, but also hilarious just when it needs to be. But what makes this a better exploitation film than a lot of ‘em is the action. Machine guns, babes with machine guns, and a ton of shit blowing up.

If you like action movies, if you like exploitation, if you like nudity, of you like prison movies than you need to watch The Big Doll House.

6.5/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

Invasion of the Bee Girls (1973)
10/23/12 review

Keep in mind, this is not a great movie. This is a fun one though.

A detective comes into town to look into the death of a scientist. Although the scientist was just one of many that died from mysterious deaths. That is until the sheriff is found dead, due to exhaustion from sex.

When he questions Dr. Harris, head of insects department. He doesn’t figure out that she’s involved right away. She keeps a lab hidden filled with radiation and bee venom, which turns women into pretty much sex death machines. Now it’s up to the detective to figure out the mysterious reasons behind these deaths.

A decent amount of nudity, which keeps the boring parts more interesting. The acting wasn’t perfect, but it plays out as a comedy, exploitation, and campy film. Don’t watch this if you’re expecting some hidden film gem. If you’re a fan of campy b movies and exploitation, sit back and enjoy!

5/10 rotting corpses
C. Vengeance

I’m about to post a shit ton of reviews. Prepare yourselves.

Bad Batch [2010]
10/19/12 review

I won’t put you through a full synopsis, that’ll just be mean. I won’t tell you that this is a good movie, that’ll be a lie. This is suppose to be a horror/comedy/psychological on what happens when you smoke too much pot.

Three college students decide to hang out, and eat some pot brownies. After they eat the pot brownies they end up having a bad trip, which eventually leads two of them to run out the house and go for a drive until they freak out and stop the car. There’s no real action here or anything. Actually, not much goes on. The movie is just pretty much bad dialogue from start to finish.

Despite just being a heavy diaglouge type of flick, there’s no progression whatsoever between the characters. The dialogue doesn’t change from when they’re sober to when they get high. In fact they talk the same way the whole time through, even when they go on their “trip”. The tension rises when they find out the weed was laced.

This flick is dull, boring, and almost painful to watch. Stay away, if you want to watch it, cool! But I warned you.

1/10 rotting corpeses
C Vengeance